Does this saying sound familiar to you?
I bet you are probably one of many who heard this often growing up, right?
If not, you were lucky.
Let’s turn a new leaf and start raising our own children a little differently.
How about we change the way we answer our kids when they want something that requires money that we do not have or refuse to give.
Jonny wants a new pair of brand-name, high-endurance, running shoes.
“Dad, I really need a new pair of ‘brand-name’, running shoes. They are the coolest and all the kids have them. I want a pair too! If I don’t get a pair of them, then Shawn’s going to beat me at basket ball and you know, I’m 10 times better than him at basket ball!”
Here are two different replies:
Dad replies with, “What do you think I’m made of? Money doesn’t grow on trees you know!“
Dad replies with, “Well son, if those shoes mean that much to you and you truly feel that Shawn will have an unfair advantage over you in basket ball, then what is your plan? How do you plan to buy those shoes? Can you think of something that you can do, or make, or service, that can raise you the money so you can buy your own pair? If you really want those shoes, son, then you’re going to have to come up with a good way to buy them. I believe you can do it. Come back to me when you have a plan and we’ll see if we can work it out together. Good luck kiddo.”
In Dad’s first reply, dad shuts Jonny’s hopes down but ALSO teaches him, although unintentionally, that life is all about ‘scarcity’. Jonny learns from these negative replies that money is hard to come by. That it is difficult to get what you want in life. That other people will always have more than you. And the list goes on and on…
On the other hand in Dad’s second reply, you can see that Dad is turning on the creative juices in his son’s mind, “okay, so I want these new shoes, how can I go about making the money to get them myself?”.
And as well as getting Jonny’s creative juices flowing on some easy ways for kids to make money, Dad is also teaching some other incredibly valuable life lessons. Like: Abundance, Optimism, Faith in his son to find a way to fullfil his desire.
He is teaching him to be responsible for himself as well as encouraging him to come up with a plan and then to work together on making that plan come to action. This alone will diminish any thoughts of theft as an option.
So how are you talking to your own kids when it comes to money?
See if you can pay attention to the next time your child asks you about money. Listen to your own reply and then meditate on it for a minute or two.
How did that answer come across to your child?
Was your child turned off of money, or encouraged to take responsibility to come up with a creative way to attract their desired goods.
I hope you have enjoyed this thoughtful session, and I look forward to writing the next. If you have any specific topics that you would like me to talk about please just leave a message and I will do my best to answer your topics of interest where concerned with kids and money.
Cheers…Amanda van der Gulik…Excited Life Enthusiast!